The Problem with Peacocking

Being more fashionable for the sake of being more attractive to the opposite sex has been the main purpose for some of my clients needing an image consultation. Often enough, I'll find out that they have joined what is called the PUA (Pick-Up Artist) community, where guys start to learn the basics of attracting women through various methods such as conversation, routines, body language, etc.

One of the things they would always bring up is what the community calls the Peacock Theory. Here is a definition of Peacocking from a PUA site:

Peacocking is a technique developed to get attention in busy, distraction filled environments such as night clubs. By wearing something showy like a cowboy hat or a glowing necklace, a PUA is able to differentiate himself from his competition in the club. This is a term derived from the biological behavior or peacocks and from Darwinism.

Peacocking can also encourage women to start conversations by commenting on the article of clothing they are wearing. The PUA can then use this as a starting point for a DHV (Demonstrating High Value) routine or some other method of generating attraction and keeping the conversation going.

Taken to the extreme, peacocking can also be a way for a PUA to DHV himself by showing that he is able to stand up to social pressure. By wearing something completely ridiculous, a PUA opens himself up to ridicule from AMOGs (Alpha Male of Group) and shit tests from women. By demonstrating that he can deal with this social pressure, the PUA demonstrates attractive alpha characteristics.

See the problem with Peacocking is that it its not for everyone. Not everyone can feel comfortable under a cowboy hat or a neon glowing necklace. And just because you refuse to wear these items, doesn't mean you won't be able to attract a girl. When it comes to men, personality is their most attractive trait, so if anything, that should be the first thing a guy should work on.

There are other ways to "attract" a girl's attention through your looks. You can have the appearance of an attractive, outgoing, charismatic person without the use of silly accessories or gimmicky props. Tons of men are still attracting women out there just by wearing a t-shirt and jeans because, when it comes to attraction, a good percentage of women will say the the most attractive thing about the man is his "sense of humor," not his silly furry hat.

I have nothing against those guys who wear outlandish clothes to the club, because I know they have their own method of attracting a certain type of girl. In all honesty, their method works because they are projecting the appearance of fun. When women go out to meet guys, that's what they want to do - have fun, and if you project it right away through your looks, then surely they will be all over you.

So what is the problem with Peacocking? Basically it boils down to being a silly fashion theory that is more about gimmick rather than showing an honest portrayal of yourself. Unless you are comfortable with the fact that, that is your honest portrayal of yourself. But you have to differentiate yourself from the "nightclub, on the hunt for girls" personality to your true personality. Can you honestly say, that you spend 24 hours of the day looking for attention from girls in the silliest way possible? No, because like most people, you have your day job, you have a life away from the clubs, and you have a life apart from picking up women.  Face it not everybody can be like these guys, because these guys below, their day jobs are to always be on the prowl:

Who are those two you might ask? That is Mystery (left) and Style (right), two of the most well known Pick-Up Artists in their respective community, so you can say they are masters when it comes to attracting women. Mystery had his own Reality Television show on VH-1 about turning regular Joes into Pick-Up artists. While Style, became a best-selling author of the most popular book about Pick-Up called, The Game. He's also author of other great books on pop culture figures such as Jenna Jameson and Russell Brand.

I want to make it clear that I have nothing against these guys, because they're motivators in their own right. They've helped countless of men out there struggling with their sexual identity by transforming them into better versions of themselves. I'm sure a lot of those who read some of their works like me, learned a thing or two about becoming a more attractive individual through their methods. I personally just don't agree with their choice of clothing.

Now back to the picture. Could you honestly say, as a person just starting to learn the basics of fashion and style wear something like that? Let's say, that you suddenly decided that you want to look more attractive to women through your clothes, then someone suggest that you should "Peacock" more by wearing this pink giant furry hat or this snakeskin suit. Would you do it, especially if it's something you've never worn before? Most likely not.

There are other ways to tone down "Peacocking." But even then, some of these guys who do tone it down are still doing it in a silly way. And for the most part, most men with this type of mentality start to look like every other guy in the club where they're trying to attract the same type of women.

So forget about "Peacocking." Replace the "Peacock Theory," with the mentality of having a "Better sense of Style." Because having better style sense allows you to be comfortable in your own skin. It makes you confident from the start because you don't have to worry about unwanted negative attention that "Peacocking" receives. In turn, what you'll receive is positive attention from those who genuinely appreciate what you're wearing and the appearance your projecting.

In all honesty, you can get the same type of girl that the "Peacocking" guy gets with a style that is more in tuned with your personality. If you're already an outgoing, attractive, charming, and charismatic person, then you don't need a purple boa to lime green shoes to show everyone that. People will take notice of your charisma no matter what you wear. You just have to wear it right and wear it YOUR WAY!

So to conclude:

1. Eliminate the theory of Peacocking from your thinking.

2. And replace it with developing a "Sense of Style" that is more in tuned with who you truly are. The best possible you. It should reflect your hobbies, your positive habits, your positive outlook on life. It should be style that is versatile and can be worn for any occasion, with friends, with family, at work, at night, at day or basically everywhere. It should be a style that is approachable, inclusive but unique, edgy, smart, fun, and topped of with a touch of class.

Besides, the best accessory you can have to attract women is not with a pink boa, but with your smile.